Sunday, January 30, 2011

Open letter to a misogynist from a member of the weaker sex

Dear Abdeslam Bouhani,

Your book, Sauvez la femme sauvez le monde. 2010. Les Editions Maghrébines. Aïn Sebaâ, Morocco, is terrible. So, so terrible. For so many reasons.

Let’s start with the title. While waiting for friends to arrive at Mohammed V airport last July, I came across your turd of a book. The title thrilled me, which is perhaps my own mistake, what with the cliché and all. But still, I mean, what feminist wouldn’t be excited about a book title about saving the world through saving women! Alright, sure, it IS inherently problematic to frame women as ‘needing’ to be saved. Nonetheless, the title had me thinking, ‘what a food for thought, what a great idea to make the title both provocative AND possibly even make it the focus of a larger debate about women as empowered instead of women as being ‘in need’ of liberation or whatever.’

But no. No, no, no. Your book is not about women. You hate women, whom you repeatedly refer to as the weaker sex.

Bouhani asserts that women, as the ‘weaker sex,’ are particularly vulnerable to the pressure of advertising, as they struggle with libidinous weakness (98) [way to go all Old Testament, guy]. The uneven way in which advertising affects women motivates unhealthy behavior in them stemming from narcissism (such as bulimia) and sows discord instead of cohesion between men and women. His analysis is not only heteronormative, but frightfully essentialist. For him, somehow women’s desire to elevate her social position is perverse and narcissistic. Bouhani further describes women narcissists, with ‘profound megalomania’ and ‘immense interest in themselves, their appearances, and their images’ (99). Bouhani criticizes women for complaining about violence against them and not being accountable for the violence that WOMEN perpetrate against men by exposing their bodies. Furthermore, women enjoy suffering, and suffering is a part of their nature. The proof is the pain of childbirth, which women willingly and enthusiastically repeat over and over again (101-102).

I am too traumatized to say any more on this point, because your misogyny pissed me off so bad last night at 3 AM that my roommate and I had a taut, heated discussion on women abusing men. Shoot me in the face. Roommate—don’t worry, we’re cool.

Your book is about railing against advertising, without offering any prescriptions. The suggestions you make are hollow and shallow at the same time—thoughtful solutions require feasible plans with explanations about how to achieve them. Instead you offer up commentary about the way the world ought to be. Anyway, it’s a relief that you don’t burden the reader with the substance of how to achieve a ‘world according to you.’ It’d be awful.

Even though the title implies that the book is about women, women almost don’t factor in at all, but for the one chapter. Otherwise you your silliness in no way applies an explicit gender analysis or critical commentary about how women fit in. Useless.

While you condemn advertising in all forms for the ways in which it victimizes the world, you, like so many others, totally waste the opportunity to talk about how the greater interconnection of individuals across society and the growing affordability of access to new technologies are improving the lives of the poor, marginalized, and voiceless of the world. But why would you?

Your real problem is with the ubiquity of images of women’s bodies in all postures. Your title to ‘save women [by] sav[ing] the world’ is totally divorced from the notion of equality between the sexes. Rather, the title, and the analysis within the book, refers to saving men from the ‘abuse’ perpetrated against them by the widespread use of women’s bodies in advertising. By sparing men this abuse, women too will be spared. Fucking ridiculous.

Also, you SUCK at citing. Absolutely, miserably fail at it. Your spelling and punctuation also are sad. Why didn’t you edit your turd?

And finally, I hate you and your turd for annoying me so much that I write this letter when I could be working on my dissertation chapter on gender relations in Morocco. At least you didn’t make me barf by adding some sanctimonious religious facet to your nonsense.



Ugh….fine, I will admit that your fondness for Marxism is charming, and your way-too-brief coverage of the impoverished is insightful…but I must temper even this paltry praise with more criticism. Where is gender in all this? Where, I ask you? You seem to believe what you wrote about the new matriarchal society. Now that IS fresh! I want more of that, even if it is total fantasy.

And the bit at the very end about replacing sex in advertising with laughter is precious. But your book is still crap. I wish I had stolen it instead of having contributed financially to your inanity. Now here is something to make you smile: why isn’t turd in the MS Word dictionary?

4 comments:

Émilie said...

Wow, reading that book would have made me angry too. Did you send him your letter?

bob said...

the woman is not the weaker sex, instead she makes a man stronger.
and probably stronger at character level and the will.
some men have a problem because they can not adapt to the evolution of women in society.
there is more time to the Middle Ages.
Women have proven themselves in war, they manage everything while they waged war for absurd reasons.
the woman is capable of much for me and my wife if successful, I would be proud of her.
the woman is not a megalomaniac, it is to succeed and believes in these capacities.
the woman is a man like any other, I mean, man or woman we are all human beings, there is no need to differentiate.
the woman is no less important than man and vice versa.
paler religion in this debate is not good, religion does not prevent women of accomplishment.
Muslim majority countries have had heads of state or governments female: Benazir Bhutto in Pakistan, Mame Madior Boye, Senegal, Tansu Ciller in Turkey, Kosovo Kaqusha Jashari, Megawati Sukarnoputri in Indonesia, and Khaleda Zia and Sheikh Hasina in Bangladesh.

each read religious books after the interpretation is different for different people.

I prefer a woman who expresses these desires, these views, there is an exchange, rather than a docile woman who answered or my orders.

Émilie said...

I just googled him and found two articles in L'Économiste from '93 and '94. Didn't know if it was the same guy until I read this: "Les femmes, êtres humains, ô combien sensibles et vulnérables, notamment pour des questions de forme et de beauté, résistent mal à cette stratégie de conquête, pratiquée par les vendeurs du Light (rêve, mythe). Elles s'adonnent coeur et âme à cette folle de mode, devenue entre temps culte, du fait de sa grande profusion à travers les murs et les habitudes de consommation" in his article titled "Après avoir envahi les cigarettes et le yaourt: Le mythe du “Light” menace les rapports sociaux".

Melodee said...

Emilie, you know I thought about sending him a letter...I did email Abdesamad Dialmy...but what could I say to him? I've got a friend reading Bouhani's book to tell me if perhaps I just didn't understand it, or he was being ironic or cynical or something, but wow. I googled him and saw those articles, but I see he hasn't written anything for over a decade except this book.